2/09/2009

Obituary of Common Sense.
 
'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has
 been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since
 his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be
 remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
 
 Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm;
 Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
 
 Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
 than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in
 charge).
 
 His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
 overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
 charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
 from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
 reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
 
 Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
 job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
 children.
 
 It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent
 to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform
 parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
 
 Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and
 criminals received better treatment than their victims.
 
 Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
 burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
 
 Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
 realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her
 lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
 
 Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
 wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is
 survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone
 Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
 
 Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone. If you
 still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do
 nothing.'

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